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Dependence, Independence

At the airport, I was I was confused, scared, and shocked at a huge change coming my way. Leaving home for New York at 22 created a whole chain of anxiety, excitement, and nerves. Now 24, I understand exactly why those emotions took the driver’s seat.

When the COVID-19 pandemic hit, my grandmother was battling with severe medical issues. Since I was a fresh graduate and the job market was pretty weak, I was right by her side. Our bond as a grandparent-grandchild grew much deeper than before during this time. Sadly, she passed away in 2021, which left a large void in my heart. Coping with her death has been terribly difficult ever since. Our dependence on one another had grown stronger over the years. But after her death, the dependence needed to part ways, Forever.

This paradigm shift left my body, mind, and soul in a state of utter chaos. Leaving my home city for the first time ever would be a different reality. It was a move from dependence in search of true independence. The economic and mental cost was going to be heavy. New York wasn’t going to be a piece of cake. Facing that challenge head-on, I finally moved to the Big Apple. The move naturally came with the struggle, the failures, and the adjustment. The new journey from dependence to independence had begun.

Arriving in Manhattan was a surreal experience. I always had a feeling that Manhattan was going to be a complex. It was true. Within the first few days of living here, I learned many lessons. Mainly these lessons consisted of responsibility and self-care.

I lost my phone. This device had all my digital life and wasn't backed up. So, most of my "digital life" went from being there to non-existent within minutes. I realized many things in the days after. Maybe that lost device was a wake-up call?

Coincidently, this happened right before my birthday. And like the many memories stored on my phone, my birthday wishes went untraceable that day.

The first few months in the city are still somewhat of a blur. Chaos reigned supreme. Later, however, things got more pleasant. Now it was time for the newfound independence to take the driver’s seat and let the dependence be on the passenger.

Life can be full of anxieties, of moving to a new place, or the angst of uncertainties. Knowing my roots and morals helped me throughout this move.

This was my story, A story of change and a journey from dependence to independence.

Pier I @Hudson River Park on 70th St - circa 2021

Mumbai International Airport, July 2021

Manhattan Skyline, 2021

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